Love & Care by Shaun Deeney

 Love & Care by Shaun Deeney

A beautifully written, moving memoir about the unbreakable bonds of family and what it means to look for love later in life

Widely praised by Kate Mosse, Tony Parsons and Raynor Winn.

 

Love & Care by Shaun Deeney is published on 9th February by Endeavour/Octopus Books. My thanks to the author and publisher, who sent me a copy, and Random Book Tours for inviting me to take part on the tour.

Synopsis

Shaun is finally free of responsibilities to anyone but himself; single, with two grown up daughters, he is just embarking on a new life in a new country when he gets a call to say his father is dying.

His mother has Parkinson's Dementia and is in a care home.

Shaun faces a stark choice: should he give up his new- found freedom, or turn his back on the woman he's fought so hard to protect, not least from his own father ?

Shaun's mother had loved and cared for her son all her life.

Could he now do the same for her ?

My review

First of all make sure that you have a box of tissues handy as I got caught out in the first few pages. This is an incredible memoir of  Love & Care that I, for one, could personally relate to as we had looked after my Dad for the last few years of his life and prior to that my Mum had been in a care home, following on from a broken hip and an inability to learn to walk again, for the last six months of her life.  Whilst she was in hospital and intervention care I spent every other day making round trips of 130 miles after work to take Mum banana and yoghurt smoothies and other meals of blended goodness as she couldn't eat and the hospital and intervention care just kept leaving jacket potatoes  and thickened drinks in front of a woman who hadn't the strength to lift a fork.

The openness of Shaun's narrative tugs at the heartstrings from many angles ; the time spent setting up the bungalow for his Mum; proving to social services that he can do this with a care package; reconciling himself with his father's past and having forgiveness at the end ; to being so candid about how his own life was affected.

There are some humorous moments too like when Shaun "lost his Dad", which brought tears of laughter to my eyes whilst also thinking does this really happen and, on the darker side, is he sure that he was given his Dad!!!!! Another one is when Shaun thinks about the "pros- not many" and "cons - a lot" of using dating sites when he is caring for his mum, puts a light hearted side to what life is actually like when you are a full time carer wondering how to keep our own life interesting whilst meeting the needs of the person you are caring for. The following quote made me laugh whilst also pulling at my heart strings;

" This is a dating website. You're expected to go to dinner, clubs, pubs, football matches, theatres, cinemas - the list goes on. Only then do you earn cosy nights in. And these would be here, with my mother sleeping down the hallway ? With carers coming and going? Think of the logistics. Actually, don't, it doesn't bear thinking about".

Finally I think there is one really apt quote in Love & Care that really sealed the book for me ;

" I smile like Frodo, deliver magic pills and potions like Gandalf, but Gollum is always lurking in the shadows".

Visit Shaun's website www.shaundeeney.com and have a look at the photographs and further information about his family and carers as this will give you further insight into his life and the wonderful caring person Shaun  is and the people he so openly writes about.

The world would be a far better place with more "Shaun's" in it.

The Author

Shaun Deeney is a former journalist and Emmy award-winning film and TV producer. He has made current affairs programmes for ITV on social issues, including care. He is also the creator of a podcast on caring for his mother called Love & Care.

Shaun has a degree in English and American Literature from Kent 

He has two daughters and loves listening to Frank Sinatra.

For more information visit  www. shaundeeney.com